1. Contata in Fugue

I like the start of this!
As you listen Fi will place
All ten fingers down at once.
Ten fingers? or is it nine or eight?
Of course! It's twelve! What a silly dunce!

You count 'em.
Then comes the fast part.

Fiona's fingers gambol up and down the keys,
With such rapidity!
On no one note she dwells.
What delightful equanimity!



Indian melted butter on the plate...
I invited a cannibal and Min for tea.
Next day he had a tummy ache.
I said "It was the Min you ate in ghee!"

We'll let Fiona play...
She'll have her way...
With J.S. Bach's creation.
Listen for the cannibal,
And Min - a Taste Sensation.




Vivaldi wrote "Four Seasons"
Turk wrote a tune for only two
It took all Spring and Winter to get it right.
What else could he do?

It's quite clear: Can you see?
Turk is half as good as Viv-aldi



Mothers! Fathers! Hear my tale
Of woe and things atrocious!
Your little kiddies are angels indeed,
When compared to the brat the Mozarts did breed.
Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart precocious!

Wolfie! What will you call this latest piece?
Said Mother to young Mozart
Your Grandpa and Grandma and Father too,
Will be here to hear the start!

"And Auntie?" said Wolfgang.
And so it is "Andante" to this day.
And Go To Bed! it would have been
If Father had had his way!

Fiona will now, show us how,
And rattle the ivories,
Andante by Wolfgang Amadeu,
And Uncle too, if you please!



Twinkle Twinkle Little Star
Said Mummy to young Wolf Mozar
(this is the French pronunciation, you understand)
Read it in French Mummy! Wolfie said
Ah vous dirai je maman. <ah voo dear ray jjer mamong>
Now go to bed.

Wolfgang needed a good excuse
To dally and stay up late,
...and other considerations,
Led to (obvious to state)
Ah vous dirai je maman
Theme and three variations!






Ludwig van Beethoven verkt in Ze Court
Where appearances had to be as they aught.
No dalliance under the border,
Was allowed by the King,
A sensible thing,
To rule for law and order.

Affairs of the heart that were out of bounds
Had to be kept inside the tent.
Each little love tune was named for some lune
To put the press gallery off the scent.
Thus "Fur Elize" was only a teaser,
And Beethoven played up 'till Lent!

His true true love was an Australian girl.
Waynette was her name.
Up in his room, her cloak he'd unfurl,
But she never shared in his fame.

So the King and Court rules made Ludwig play tricks
with the titles of tunes - so I bet!
Be thankful
Fiona can play "Fur Elize"
Does not have to play "Fur Waynette"!




The writer of this ditty
Works to the strict conditions
Ere you be dim or you be witty
No politics. no politicians

The chooser of the program
Works to a different scheme
In choosing composers: I vouch so.
Look who comes next! It is Marx!
Right here waiting's the theme,
Can't be Karl: it's got to be Groucho

As verses to this poem come
And verses to this poem go
Can leave you "Right Here Waiting"
For this Poem's end I know
What nonsense! This caprice!
Fiona will play, and nobody sings,
And Groucho wrote the piece!






I now explain the Waltz to you
It was tricky at the start
Three quarters time was on the score
At least I knew that part

Three Quarters Time
There is no catch
As you all prob'ly know
Means the bloody footy match
Has one quarter left to go!


The Danube rises north of Switzerland
Flows North then West through Germany
Then Austria, Czechoslovakia on either hand
Then South through Hungary
Then West through Romanian land
Then off to the Black Sea.

Along its travels it changes its name:
Donau Dunaj (dooneye) Duna Dunav Dunarea. <duna-ree>
A new name in each country! <count-aree>
Each ruler has his wish.
If you think this confusing for you and me,
Think what it's like for the fish!

The one name it never has...
To a local who sits on the bank,
Is Danube. That name is not known,
From the alps to the sea, to be frank.


Then what of its colour?
Surely not blue!
More tannery brown, the gunk out the back!
Or die works red, oil refinery poo!
No wonder the Black Sea's black!

In spite of all this,
We think of the bliss,
Of J. Strauss as he made up the tune!
The Blue Danube Waltz,
My claim is not false,
I'll let the music start soon.

The nonsense: the myth of the
The Blue Danube river's just guf!
But listen. take care and you'll hear,
For our token waltz,
Fi will show us her stuff!
When she finishes, give her a cheer!